the South Bank Freak Show

welcome gentlemen and gentle ladies

welcome to the South Bank Freak Show

im glad to see you part with your pennies

for an hour with me

this show, i assure you, is world famous

we’ve been on the telly and on the press

we’re famous because of our success

we’re famous because you lot cannot entertain

the thought of us living amongst you lot

i see tired faces in the crowd

don’t let your pennies go to waste gentlemen and gentle ladies

you lot, hardly Plath’s peanut crunching crowd

but you lot will have to do tonight

please people please take delight in our plight

i promise this show is done in good taste

we have the three eyed man, the lady with no ears

and the baby that aged a hundred years

enjoy the show gentlemen and gentle ladies

feel no shame for we take pride in our differences

we care nothing for your ways and your mores

its our pride that feeds our pockets (as we empty yours).